disclaimer: don't be offended if your spouse is your bff- this is simply my opinion which isn't worth crap anyway....
today is my 18 year anniversary. wow. hitting numbers like a boss!!
i have known my husband well over half of my life. we met in high school to be exact. ahhhh, cute right?? i have literally grown up with this man. he is my friend. he is not my best friend. this isn't because i don't find him worthy or don't like him as much as someone else but for me i don't want him to have to carry that title. i need him to be all kinds of other things to me and the pressure of having to be a best friend? to a girl? your wife? nah, i will find a chick for that.
i don't like to bother shane with certain things like asking if my butt looks big in jeans. a best friend will answer truthfully saying, "hmmmm.....ya know what? it does look kinda big - i don't like them on you" then they will shop for 6 hours and help you find a better pair. my husband on the other hand will tell me no, (because he damn better) then proceed to attack said butt mostly to get out of the impending 6 hour shopping trip.
there are all kinds of best friend jobs that shane would simply hate. like first of all he would have to hear me rave about my latest cookie recipe-he wants to eat the cookie not hear how i put in a secret ingredient that really made them super moist this time.
he doesn't want to sit on the phone with me during my drive home and hear all about the jack-hole that just cut me off and how i could have had a kid in the car and how dare this ass put me and my family in jeopardy! i can get all road rage crazy and that's probably not the cutest look.
he doesn't want to help me figure out what to wear to an important meeting and he truly has no opinion if the light nail polish looks better than the dark. he doesn't have a cute shirt i can borrow and he certainly doesn't care to hear about how this latest form of birth control is making me crabby. if it has to do with my lady town he would rather live in the world that says this is the best run town around and all systems are in check.
i just can't put this guy through all that knowing that he'd honestly rather not.
i just can't put this guy through all that knowing that he'd honestly rather not.
friendship is definitely one of the key ingredients in our marriage. we have a great time together he just isn't my bestie. besides i wouldn't make out with my bestie- that's just weird........
oh man, ya know what? i think i married my best friend.....
happy anniversary to the BEST husband and friend ever!!
Well I guess I know from first hand experience that you two were made for each other and will be for all eternity. Lots of love to both of you.
ReplyDeleteHappy Anniversary you two! I will always say that your wedding was one of the most beautiful I've ever seen. :) It truly was a lovely ceremony, and a really fun reception.
ReplyDeleteLove this post and can totally relate! Although I do treat my guy as my best friend by sharing certain not-cute, TMI, info-that-should-be-saved-for-my-gal-pal kind of stuff...I often question myself for doing so! Bottom line, it's great to have a wonderful partner who is also your friend, best or not. Totally love your blog, by the way, and your sense of humor.
ReplyDeleteTamar :)
Great post! As much as I love my husband, and I do consider him to be my best friend, there are just certain roles he can not fulfill. I LOVE to talk for hours about relationships and people and basically anything psychological. My husband sort of gets a dazed look on his face when I try to get into this stuff with him. I should really know better than to try to talk about that stuff with my husband. It's just not his thing. And that's okay. Luckily, I have some GREAT friends who love nothing more than to get all psychological with me. I believe that no individual- not your husband, not your BFF- can fulfill every one of your interpersonal needs. You have to get a little from here and a little from there. Kind of like a buffet table. :)
ReplyDeleteA late Congratulations to you, we hit 18 this June. Kicking ass and taking names! No really the more likely sentiment is ... Sheesh that is a really, really long time ;) This is the greatest Kendra. Really, I couldn't agree with you more. Giants don't make very good Besties anyways, it's just not in their nature. Girl we really are kindred spirits.
ReplyDeletewhat a sweet post
ReplyDeletea very belated congrats!
i noticed the leis in your wedding picture..is your husband hawaiian? mines is! only he grew up in the south. we plan to visit there next year!